What do you really want?

Sometimes wisdom shows up from the most interesting places. I was watching a movie, a light romantic comedy– not the sort of movie from which I would expect to get many ‘aha’ moments. But, indeed, suddenly there it was. One character asked another, “Are there any primary, bottom-line questions that apply to any and all situations in life?” The answer was, “Ask yourself, what do you really want, and then ask yourself if you are willing to ask for help to get it.”

Really? Could it be this simple? Does everything come down to these two questions? If we asked these questions regularly, could life be easier to navigate?

Children know this wisdom instinctively, right? They know what they really want — food, a toy, a hug, an ice-cream cone — and they are more than willing to ask for help to get it! Then, we grow up and we begin to take on the attitude that life doesn’t work like this – that we can’t have what we really want. Hmmm…what if we could?

In coaching, we’re all about the belief that our clients can indeed have what they want, and our work is engaging with them to get it. It’s the core of the coaching model, however we each approach it — “where are you right now, and where do you want to go?” or, “who do you want to be?” or, “what do you want to do?” or, “what’s in your heart?” As coaches, we do a great job believing in our clients. It is sometimes harder to have that same strong and sure belief in ourselves. It’s why I and all the coaches I know have coaches of our own!

The wisdom in the movie struck me as brilliantly wise, and just like I do with my clients, I am now asking myself, ‘what do I really want?’ and ‘how do I ask for help to get it?’ So, in this moment, just try asking yourself the two questions: What do I really want? Am I willing to ask for help to get it?

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